Something that I really learned from this week is the courage to be humble and the real meaning of sustaining your leaders, no matter how hard it is. No complaining, no asking questions. Just follow. Because I know that they know what's best for me and that they are guided by righteous decisions inspired from Heavenly Father.
So my plans of extending even just for a few days won't really happen despite the excitement due to some protocols that have to be obeyed. After being explained by President Poulsen, I've thought of it over and over and didn't hesitate to let him know that I totally understand and I will abide by the protocols set by the missionary department. I felt shaken and I felt so bad that I had put some burden on President's shoulders in the first place when I knew that there would be that huge possibility that my plan wouldn't go well as I had thought. I chose to be humble and to sustain my mission president. Heartbreaking as it was for me, I knew there was something that I needed to understand and that I know that Heavenly Father had a purpose on why He didn't want me to stay a little longer than I had hoped.
Things have went well this transfer and we were able to achieve our baptismal goals this week. But after that I've really thought to myself a lot. After having a Filipino Meeting on how to become a consecrated missionary , I've thought and evaluated on myself and I knew that I needed to change a lot. My companion Sister Lau has always been supportive because that day when I had to learn the lesson of humility, Sister Lau complimented me of how a consecrated missionary I was because I humbled myself down and followed protocols without complaining. She also told me that I also strive to become better each day and I recognize things that I always needed to improve on.
Heavenly Father has blessed us with people to teach last week but then it suddenly went down hill at the end of the week. We found out that our underage investigator lied to us about getting permission from her mom. Our potentially progressing investigators either would not answer the phone or did not go to church. We were getting pretty worried and we were again at the finding stage. Missionary work is always like that and we never really stop finding the elect. It's just hard. But it is through these trials that we need to recognize the tender mercies of the Lord, to push ourselves and to keep working harder, especially I have quite a few months left. That is the power of the Atonement. That is the sufficiency of the Savior's grace. That is what a missionary should experience. To work hard, to dedicate all their heart, might, mind and strength to the work of the ministry. There will be not much thoughts on home. We just have to enjoy the work and just like what our zone leaders said to "Put the blood in [our] mouths."
Surely as well, I've seen a lot of tender mercies these past few days despite the exhaustion, stress and (right now) feeling a little sick because of my hormones. I've really seen how much Heavenly Father does really care for me because of the people around me. My companion is actually one of them, as there are also so members of the church who are really sweet and who do make the missionaries happy even with the smallest things. Materialistic as I may sound right now but the things that makes me super glad right now is the thoughtfulness and the love that the members had especially this couple that we met (I think I've mentioned this last update) is good friends with the members of the Nashville Tribute Band. If in case you don't know them, they are the people who sang the missionary song "I was Born" or the "Emma" song. For missionaries, if you are familiar with "The Work", you would know what I am talking about. Well, I really love the Nashville Tribute Band and I was able to listen to some of their songs before my mission. I heard more of their song here in the mission in Temple Square and in Georgia. The said couple offered to send us record albums from the said band and I only requested for "The Trek" and "Redeemer". Well, they sent us ALL of the four major tribute albums. Makes me even happier since I love music soooo much!
Well, at this time, I just needed to take a deep breath and not push myself too hard. I love this work. I love the success that we have had this transfer. But most especially, I love seeing the people grow, seeing myself grow. I am really glad that I came on my mission. Which even amazes me that it is through my mission experiences that I came to know of my mother even more. My mom was such a consecrated missionary, definitely such a huge example. Her mission president told me something that I never knew about my mom, as she never really shared it with me. My mom, though, shared with me the things that she has learned in her mission rather than her success stories. Thinking of those moments actually brings me to tears because it was because of those experiences that has helped me in my mission today. And I hope it will become a continuing legacy for generations to come. The Church is true. I have faith and I look forward to another transfer. More people to find, more people to teach, more people to invite, more opportunities to grow.
Here is my new scripture for the week: Omni 1:26 "And now, my beloved brethren, I would that ye should come unto Christ, who is the Holy One of Israel, and partake of his salvation, andthe power of his redemption. Yea, come unto him, and offer your whole souls as an offering unto him, and continue in fasting and praying, and endure to the end; and as the Lord liveth ye willbe saved."
Sister Kristel Marie Cruz Ngo (吳姐妹)Utah Salt Lake City Temple Square Mission/